Well, here it is.  The night before.  The closets are cleaned the boxes are loaded, the items are priced and I’m exhausted.

Have you ever wondered how really significant the night before a big event is?  We have Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve, but then there is the night before the wedding, the night before the whatever the big event is going to be.  In my case, it is the night before the garage sale.  Usually, the night before is filled with anticipation and high hopes or dread depending upon the situation.  I am not sure how I’m feeling right now.  Apprehensive, indifferent, a little nervous?  Hmmm.  Usually, though with all big events, if there is any nervousness or apprehension the night before, it dissipates when the big day dawns.  The exception to this might be the wedding ceremony.  I don’t know. I guess I can’t really put a wedding and a garage sale in the same category unless you consider that I’m selling a bunch of the stuff collected as the result of the wedding at the garage sale tomorrow.  But I digress.

I hate garage or yard sales.  Oh, I like going to them.  I’ve picked up many a furnishing at rock bottom prices by shopping around this way.  But I hate hosting a garage sale for a number of reasons.

Reason Number One:  It means I really have to clean house.  Now I don’t mean scrubbing the floors or toilets kind of cleaning.  I mean going through each and every item in the house and getting rid of anything you haven’t used regularly in the last year.  The exception to that rule would be seasonal decorations or camping gear which you use annually but only during a particular season of the year.  This, to me, is tedious, mindless work.  It is necessary, but tedious and mindless nonetheless. I’d rather be doing just about anything else. 

Reason Number Two:  It means I have to live in a state of disarray and disorder and clutter for a period of time.  It reminds me too much of moving and packing to move.  I hate that temporary chaos and am only willing to endure it under the most desperate of circumstances.  I revel in order and I can only endure temporary chaos for the purpose of achieving greater order in the end.

Reason Number Three:  It means you have to give up at least of day of your life and sit outside your house and peddle your wares, while the world walks by and looks at all your junk. I mean, have you ever stopped to consider the things your junk reveals about you.  Oh my!  The old codger down the street can come by and take a look at the many varieties of books I’m getting rid of, which I collected from somewhere else and haven’t read, and don’t want to read, which is why I’m getting rid of them. Yet he wonders about my perspectives just the same.  The batty lady on the cul de sac across the way can come by and wonder, “Hmmm, wonder what she used that for?”  Sheesh!   I find this demeaning and if I weren’t so up against it financially, I’d just give all the stuff away. 

Reason Number Four:  It’s a boatload of work for marginal results.  The last time I had a garage sale, it went okay, but I collapsed afterward.  The time before that, my mother was still alive and she helped me.  She is the guru of garage sales and spent a great deal of her retirement having sales like this so she could put us kids through school and pay the bills.  That time she helped me, I did collapse of heat exhaustion.  I really hate these things.

Reason Number Five:  There is clean up involved afterward…and stress beforehand. 

Reason Number Six:  There is never any guarantee how much you will make or how much you will get rid of.  It is kind of a crap shoot. 

Reason Number Seven:  I have to get up early on a day when I’d most prefer not to.  At least I’ll have my coffee.

And, I’m sure by the end of the day tomorrow I will have several more reasons to add to the list.  Sigh.

So, with all the downsides to having a garage sale, why am I doing this?  Good question.  I am now, on this very Garage Sale Eve, wondering the same thing myself.  It originally started with me just going through stuff and deciding to get rid of it all.  Then when I saw how much I had, I thought, “Hmmm, wonder if I can get something for this.  Maybe, with gas prices the way they are and my car problems being what they’ve been, I should take a whack at it and see if I can’t make a few dollars, to offset these expenses.”  So, here I am, wishing I didn’t have to do this and hoping that all goes well and that I can make some money and get rid of all the stuff.  Absolutely none of it is coming back into the garage.  We’ll see how it goes.  Clearly I have the night before jitters. 

Well, a glance at the clock tells me that if I don’t get to bed now, I’m going to be a wreck in the morning and a tired grumpy garage sale wreck is not what I need.  So, I’m signing off.  Wish me well.  And while you’re out and about tomorrow enjoying your free time, be glad you aren’t having a garage sale.  But would you think of me and wish me well?  I’ll let you know how this “big event” goes tomorrow. 

Hey, does anyone need a blender?  How about an iron, brand new, used twice?  I have one, dirt cheap!  Okay, well then, enjoy your Saturday.